It's like she's already gone...

We went to the drama banquet for Jaz tonight. It was very nice. Jasmine received several awards....yeah Jaz!!!!! Steve and I were sitting in a row of chairs off to the side of the banquet tables. Jaz was on the other side of the room...having come in late from the senior trip.

We were sitting by the "presidency" table...of all the drama presidency of the year. I noticed throughout the evening that many of them were weeping. When one started they all went. I can understand this because I am a weeper myself. BUT tonight I did not feel even on inkling of tears coming on. Strange.

I was thinking about this and realized all these kids were crying about being seniors and moving on. It's natural and to be expected. I cried buckets last year knowing Chelsea was graduating and going to college. I was a mess. I was NOT ready to let her go. I'm still not.

Jaz on the other hand...I'm sad she is graduating but it doesn't seem real yet. She has spent so much of her senior year at rehearsals, practises, school something, drama, choir, friends, drama, choir, drama, and friend drama that we haven't seen her that much. At the beginning of the year I was sad a lot (and fairly grumpy) because she was gone. (She and I had been running buddies over the summer...I missed that relationship we'd developed.)

I know I'm not ready for her to go off to school...but with the way her senior year has been it's almost like she's already gone. Like I really lost two last year when Chelsea graduated. Maybe this was her way of easing me into it? :-) I wonder if I was like that? Always gone. I don't remember spending much time at home my senior year either.

Could it be like being pregnant for 9 months...by the end you are really ready to have that baby not matter the pain involved? As kids get older they are home less and less so when they do finally leave we are already acclimated to it somewhat. It's a thought. Hmmm.

Jabbering...

Toddlers are so dang funny!!! Have you ever listened to them chatter? I was driving (it's my mom-job) on I-15 the other day. I knew she was jabbering away...I just wasn't paying attention to everything she was saying.

I started listening and it was so funny. She started out talking then interjected bits of song from Jingle Bells. Steve usually puts her to bed and he is partial to Christmas tunes...no matter the time of year! (Bella grew up on Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer...I've got the funniest video of listening to them sing.)

Can't believe they actually go to sleep after Steve sings with them. Josie is a big fan of Twinkle Little Star too. The word "Berla" comes up alot in her conversations as well. Means "Bella".

Anyway, her conversation with herself periodically got quite animated and intense. I realized after the 2rd semi-truck passed us that she was saying "LOOK OUT"!!!!! Sounded like "k OUT". I laughed and laughed. I explained to her that those big trucks were on the road too and it was ok. She calmed down after that and was back to jingling all the way!

Desperate for...

Gum is kind of a no-no around here. Don't get me wrong. I love gum. I HATE listening to my children chew gum. It drives me nuts!!!



Whenever we are at the store my girls ask for gum. I say, "No, I don't want to hear it". Of course they beg and plead and swear they will not chew loud or with their mouths open. Still...no gum. Santa and the Easter Bunny seem to frequently bring gum though. That just proves they are real...I WOULD NEVER BUY GUM. ;-)



So...I'm on a diet. That doesn't seem relevant except...what did I find myself doing today? Running through all the stash spots looking for sugar-free gum. I was tearing through the closet trying to find any spot that might have been missed. I found myself rummaging through the "pill" box. (Bottles of pills we don't leave around: hydrocodone, flexeril...you know, the big guns). Eureka!!!!! I found a pack of gum.



I was tearing through the outside cellophane wrapper when I had to sit back and just laugh. I was like a deranged drug seeker tearing through the pill box...to find gum! What's better is that I actually found some in there (not a usual hiding spot for stuff).



I'm thinking that if the words diet and drug seeker are in the same sentence that maybe dieting should be against the law too?!?

Just a quick note...

While we were in the car today Bella was talking to me. She is a big talker! I just thought this was pretty cute how she was trying to describe something to me. We were talking about a "note" she wanted to take to a friends house today. A note she worked days on coloring and decorating.

She was trying to describe a decoration she had on her note. She said, "it is so pretty and she is going to love it. She will really like the part that chomps the paper." Chomps the paper? Luckily, I had seen the note so I did the mom mental run through to try to figure it out. She was talking about staples. She had used the stapler when she decorated the note.

So there ya go...whenever you need the stapler just ask for the paper chomper. They'll get it!

My office

If you are a mom, have you ever noticed that you do NOT get left alone in the bathroom? It seems like that would be the ONLY place you would be left alone...but alas...that is not meant to be. Maybe it's just my family. I don't know?

Bella always follows me to the bathroom. Or calls me if she's in the bathroom...since she has been potty trained our time there is a two way street. Josie...Josie can't stand if I'm in the bathroom with the door shut. She will stand there and scream and push and hit the door. If she gets it open she smiles and walks to the other side of the door and shuts it...all the way. Like "I've got you where I want you...muuhahaha". When Chelsea, Jaz, and Kenzi were little they said things like, "Mommy, are you in there"? "Let us in". "Don't you love me"? And would then carry on a conversation with me with periodic bursts of what sounded like children ramming the door. I can just picture Chels and Jaz at that age rigging up a catapult and letting Kenzi fly. Or if I wasn't talking I'd see 1-3 sets of fingers under the door. They would just wait there for me like I was going to try to escape through the window or something...wouldn't it be more fun to play? Whatever is this bond between mom's and children that can't seem to stretch to the bathroom? Cuz, my apron strings will definitely let me go to the bathroom by myself.

You would think I am talking past tense about my older girls..."oh they never left me alone in the bathroom when they were little...". But it's worse now that they are older. I have even experimented. If I close the door 98% of the time someone opens it to talk to me. It's to the point I just leave it open and welcome anyone in. I do worry that someday I will leave it open or someone will open it for me when we have company near the bathroom door. Sheeesh...how embarrassing.

For the last 3 years we have lived in my mother-in-laws basement...with one bathroom that the 7 of us share. (Oh...in case you're thinking "just lock the door"...it doesn't lock). Makes for less imagination that's for sure. Poor Steve. Chelsea and Jasmine have even referred to the bathroom as my office. WHY???? Chelsea love, love, loves to capture me in the bathroom. They have told me that they wait for me to go in there because they know I am a captive audience. I have actually heard them outside the door saying, "She's mine now...you had her for an hour after school"! Could we be a bit dysfunctional? :-)

Actually, we do seem to end up in the bathroom on many talking occasions. Talking with your teenagers is VERY important...so they say. "They" never said where to talk! Now that I think about it...I remember ending up talking in the bathroom with my mom...or sister. Doing hair, laughing, brushing teeth, laughing, just sitting around reminiscing...NOT going potty though. My girls don't have that boundary. I have learned to adapt. It's all good. We laugh, we cry, we get it all out. We laugh a lot in the bathroom. That is good.

I will even forewarn them..."I am in a hurry and need a shower. Tell me what you want to tell me so I can get in". Minutes later I am still waiting to get in the shower. I continue to give pre-naked warnings until I am fed up and just strip. A girl has got to get a shower, dang it. They avert their eyes and continue on. Funny thing about that. IF anyone (including me) has to go potty while anyone else in the house is getting ready for a shower we have to wait. If you walk in, there is screaming, throwing of things, and guilt to deal with. Yet...all that modesty, privacy, and oh-my-gosh-you-CAN'T-see-me-naked mentality doesn't apply to the mom. I don't know why.

Some day...maybe years and years from now when Bella and Josie are all grown up. I'm going to be lonely in the bathroom. I'll stand around and say, "Hey Steve...step into my office"!!!!!

Nature and Jasmine's Scholarship Interview

I took Jasmine to a college scholarship interview the other day in Rock Springs, Wyoming...not a school she ever even knew about but they saw her at a big theatre day and have been actively trying to recruit her ever since. Thinking the weather should be great because it was the last day of April we were pretty excited for a little road trip. Until Steve checked the weather and let us know it could be a bit snowy in the mountians. Ugh.

We got up extra early so we could leave by 6 a.m. As we walked out of the house (at 5:45 I might add) it was snowing. I actually had to use the scraper to get all the snow off the windshield...in April. Am I living in Minnesota?? I was a bit aprehensive about what lay ahead in the mountains since it was so snowy in the valley.

We were pleasantly surprised that it wasn't horrible driving through the mountians. Yes, we had to be careful and slow down at times...but once we hit Park City the snow pretty much cleared up. It was a beautiful overcast day. The clouds were amazing with little sprinkles the rest of the drive to Rock Springs.

Once there we scoped out the room she was going to be interviewed in. (For the Superior Scholarship...smart girl). We walked around the campus a little, found the theater where we were going to watch The Music Man later that night, and arranged for a tour of housing. We had a great time. Her interview went very well. We went to lunch. We went and saw the wild mustang viewing area. Tried to talk Steve into letting us adopt one! ;-) Did you know they are only $185 to adopt one. :-O I know...that's a fairly deceiving price when you take into account all that goes into caring for a horse. I was teasing Steve...but man what a dream come true. Anywho...we went to a movie and a small dinner. (Passing time until The Music Man). Took a brisk, windy, walk on a walking path at the school. We thought it would be a quick little walk into nature but holy cow...it went around the ball fields and then out into the middle of nowhere. OH...Jaz had cell service the whole time. She only tripped on the trail 4-5 times while she was texting. BUT unfortunately for me it was not really in the middle of nowhere. I had to go potty in a major way and could see traffic in the distance almost everywhere we were. When the cactus plants started looking like Porta-Potty's we decided to turn around and go back the way we came.

We had decided over the course of the day that the show would be a major deciding factor if the musical theatre program there was "up to snuff". She is having a hard time choosing which school to go to. The actual theatre was a little smaller than another school she is looking at but the show was fantastic!! We had made a pact that if the show wasn't very good we would leave at intermission. When the time came there was no doubt we were staying for the rest of the show. Getting home earlier be danged!!!

When we left the weather was windy and cold in Rock Springs...and very dark! I got turned around once and added an extra 15 minutes to our trip home...but all was well. I had been fully loaded with caffiene throughout the day. The weather was great...nothing to worry about. We were flying along and I was thinking "we will make good time home...yippee".

I missed an exit for a potty stop in Evanstan and then crossed the border into Utah...straight into a wall of fog. Traffic was down to thirty-five to forty. AND the roads were dark, wet and the lines were very difficult to see. Needless to say our trip was lengthened. At one point in the fog there was a deer on the right side of the road. Just standing on the white line...almost thumbing (or hoofing) for a ride it seemed. I might have stopped for him if I had seen him earlier. :-) Finally drove out of the fog into more drizzle. Wet roads do not make me happy. I can't see the lines and it makes me a white knuckle driver.

Finally found a potty stop in Heber...although we had to back track to it (again) because the familiar gas station was closed for the night. We saw a couple toasted women and tried to get back on the road in front of them to avoid the drunk driving. Off we go, feeling good about the last leg of the trip...tired and ready to be home. I guess it was so late that as we came around Deer Creek I got a little discombuberated. I had no idea if we had crossed the dam or not. Turns out we hadn't...but I did see 3 more deer on the left side of the road. All spaced out like a police speeding trap. Don't deer sleep at night? Sheesh!

Finally around 2:10 Jasmine and I roll to a stop at home! Thank goodness...safe, sound, tired and strung out on caffiene.