We went to the drama banquet for Jaz tonight. It was very nice. Jasmine received several awards....yeah Jaz!!!!! Steve and I were sitting in a row of chairs off to the side of the banquet tables. Jaz was on the other side of the room...having come in late from the senior trip.
We were sitting by the "presidency" table...of all the drama presidency of the year. I noticed throughout the evening that many of them were weeping. When one started they all went. I can understand this because I am a weeper myself. BUT tonight I did not feel even on inkling of tears coming on. Strange.
I was thinking about this and realized all these kids were crying about being seniors and moving on. It's natural and to be expected. I cried buckets last year knowing Chelsea was graduating and going to college. I was a mess. I was NOT ready to let her go. I'm still not.
Jaz on the other hand...I'm sad she is graduating but it doesn't seem real yet. She has spent so much of her senior year at rehearsals, practises, school something, drama, choir, friends, drama, choir, drama, and friend drama that we haven't seen her that much. At the beginning of the year I was sad a lot (and fairly grumpy) because she was gone. (She and I had been running buddies over the summer...I missed that relationship we'd developed.)
I know I'm not ready for her to go off to school...but with the way her senior year has been it's almost like she's already gone. Like I really lost two last year when Chelsea graduated. Maybe this was her way of easing me into it? :-) I wonder if I was like that? Always gone. I don't remember spending much time at home my senior year either.
Could it be like being pregnant for 9 months...by the end you are really ready to have that baby not matter the pain involved? As kids get older they are home less and less so when they do finally leave we are already acclimated to it somewhat. It's a thought. Hmmm.
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